I literally choked on my smoke laughing at this.

Some nerve I have…

Being this horny, knowing I’m too tired and lazy to properly incite an orgasm in a woman’s body.

Or am I?



Oh my gosh! I hadn’t heard of a shooting, but Des Moines, and the Drake area are all really nice places. Extremely low crime rate for a city this size! Haters gonna hate!

i know!! des moines and the drake neighborhood are great. 

*daps you like a black person*


The Adventures of George Washington by LadyHistory [more]

Reblog if it’s okay to befriend you, ask questions, ask for advice, rant, vent, let something off your chest, or just have a nice chat.
reblog if there is someone you would like to be giving oral sex to right now.



I told my best friend I could recite an entire episode of Spongebob from memory and I did

holy shit


I went to Omaha to see my friends perform their sketch show.

Came back to Des Moines…

Started a sketch group. I’m just doing it…